Disclaimers and Notes: Lets see. Square owns Final Fantasy, and its characters. Like the ones from FF4, FF5, FF6, FF7, and FF9 that I use in this chapter. ^_^ Sue my butt and get my little sister's kitten. Or...um... my sister's car...yes, that's it... mwahaha...
When You're Evil and Dead
Chapter 16: Meanwhile
Sephiroth glared over his shoulder at the guards that followed him as he trod through the cheerful streets of Fantasy Terminus. The place in heaven where all that was good in Final Fantasy went when it died.
He'd never seen so many moogles and chocobos in his life. Or afterlife. The place, on a whole, was somewhat nauseating.
Sephiroth continued down the main street, ignoring the curious looks from the people that watched him from the safety of anywhere that was more than ten feet away from him. He skulked along, a dark smudge amongst the cheery scenery.
"I wish I had my sword," he sighed to himself. He would've made mincemeat of the whole town in a matter of minutes. Of course, the security in heaven was fully aware of this, and held his sword back in customs.
He was starting to wish that Lucrecia didn't live on the far side of town. But oh well, it was still fun making some of the more skittish residents scatter with his mere prescence.
"Not like I can do anything with dumb and dumber following me," Sephiroth grumbled and cast another glare back at the guards that had been assigned to follow him so that he didn't cause trouble. The angels glared back.
After some more walking, Sephiroth neared an outdoor cafe. There was a collection of people gathered around several tables that had been pushed together, talking and laughing.
And eating, Sephiroth noted with a pang in his stomach.
"Stupid munchie-less hell..."
There were three blonde men at the tables, along with two brunette women and a purple haired woman. Two green haired women were sitting at another table playing cards. Sephiroth recognized a few of the people and froze in his tracks.
"Aw, shit..." Sephiroth muttered, looking for another way. There was none. "Just my frikking luck..."
The people at the table had stopped talking and had turned to look at him curiously.
"Who's that?" Edgar wondered.
"Ar, I dunna know," Faris said with a shrug.
Garnet squinted at Sephiroth. "Hey, isn't that..."
"Sephiroth! Hey!" Zidane jumped out of his seat and hopped over to the black-clad villain. "How's my sister?"
Sephiroth blinked, looking away from the table. "Your sister?" He noted the excited creme-colored tail waving behind Zidane. "Oh, that's right. You're Kuja's brother."
"She's doing all right, I guess..." Sephiroth cringed as he noted another of the blondes at the table get up.
"Something wrong?" Zidane wondered.
"H-hide me..." Sephiroth took a step back, a silver eyebrow twitching anxiously.
"Huh?" Zidane turned to see what was making the villain so upset.
"You creep! What do you think you're doing up here?!" Cloud knocked the genome aside as he stomped up to Sephiroth.
"Gee, I think you've gotten friendlier," Sephiroth said dryly.
"Answer my question!" Cloud punched Sephiroth in the stomach.
"And stronger," Sephiroth winced, unhurt.
"Cloud, just leave him alone! He can't do anything here!" Tifa called from the table.
"Why don't you just go back to hell with all the other worthless evil souls!"
"Hey, my sister's down there!" Zidane snapped defensively, getting back to his feet.
"I thought you hate your sister, Zidane," Cloud said, turning away from Sephiroth for a moment.
"I..." Zidane hesistated, brushing off his vest as he looked at Garnet. She shrugged. "I never said that. I may not really be too fond of her, but I don't hate her!"
"Anymore, at least," Garnet piped in.
"It's not Kuja's fault that she was evil, that's just what happened," Zidane said. "And from what you've told me, the same's true for Sephiroth. Neither of them could control how they were created. So just leave 'em alone!"
Cloud turned back to glare at Sephiroth. "It's not the circumstances of birth that matter, it's what you do with the life that counts!" He pointed at Sephiroth. "And you wasted your life!"
"Death is turning out a lot better," Sephiroth said with a shrug.
"Ay, he does have a point there, Cloud," Faris said, hiccupping.
"No one asked the drunk-crossdressing-pirate's opinion," Cloud said over his shoulder. Faris harrumphed and took a sip of her drink.
"I still say 'ee's a jerk," Faris said to Tifa.
"He has his moments," Tifa sighed.
"We could have both turned out bad just like them," Zidane said. "But they did instead. You can't hold it against them."
"You really are a sap, Zidane," Sephiroth smirked. The blonde grinned.
"Yeah, I know."
"I don't care what anyone says, I still don't have to like you," Cloud said, turning away and stalking off down the street.
Sephiroth scratched his head curiously as he watched the spikey-haired man enter a flower shop. "Someone sure woke up on the wrong side of the bed this millenium."
"He's been grumpy lately," Tifa said with a sigh. "How he got into heaven with a grudge like that is beyond me."
Zidane waved his tail cheerfully. "You want to have a drink with us, Sephiroth?"
"Uh, well..." Sephiroth looked back at the angel guards, who shrugged. "Sure, I guess so."
Sephiroth sat between Tifa and Faris at the table. The pirate looked at him curiously.
"Yer a tall fellow, aren'tcha?"
He smirked for a moment. "You should see my sword."
Faris considered this, then burst out laughing.
"She's had a bit too much to drink," Garnet said apologetically.
"So I see," Sephiroth said, sweatdropping.
"So what are you doing here anyways, Sephiroth?" Tifa wondered.
"I was gonna visit my mother," Sephiroth said, accepting the drink that Zidane set on the table. "But it's an awfully long walk."
"You mean Lucrecia?" Edgar wondered. Sephiroth nodded.
"How did you know?"
"Cloud likes to bitch," Tifa said with a faint sigh. "He really doesn't like you, Sephiroth."
"I don't know why," Sephiroth said in a slightly sarcastic tone.
"Probably for the same reason I still don't like Kefka."
"Or why I don't like Kuja," Garnet said.
"You leave Kuja out of this," Sephiroth grumbled defensively. "Hey, can I have another drink?"
"Hey, how did you get a Bahamut card?" one of the green-haired women snapped from where they were playing cards.
"I've always had it," the other green haired woman said.
"You've never used it before," Rydia said.
"Because I don't want to lose it!" Terra hissed back.
"All those darn arrows, how are you going to lose it?"
The drinking party looked over at the women.
"What're they doing?" Sephiroth wondered as he was brought another drink.
"Playing Tetra Master," Edgar shrugged. "That's all they seem to do anymore."
"Terra's trying to win back her 'Save the Queen' card from Rydia," Garnet whispered with a smirk.
"Oh, I see," Sephiroth said, although he didn't.
Several drinks later...
"So what does Kefka do now?" Edgar wondered, leaning on the table. Faris was passed out in his lap.
"Not much, mostly," Sephiroth said, his voice somewhat slurred. "He tries to shteal Kuja from me. Or I try to shteal her from him. Shumthing like that..."
"You two really seem to like her," Garnet said.
"Yeup..." Sephiroth smiled faintly. "Ish more fun to drink with her than you guys. She knows better drinking games."
"What a honorable comparison," Edgar said dryly.
"Yeah, I think so too," the silver haired villain smiled again.
Zidane looked keenly at Sephiroth. "You know, most people look for love when they're alive."
Sephiroth shrugged. "Well... I was busy while I was alive, now wasn't I?"
"I guess so." Zidane watched as Sephiroth continued to drink. "But why Kuja?"
"She's priitty," the villain hiccupped. "An' she's niiiice..."
"Must be a villain thing," Zidane said, sweatdropping.
"Maybe," Sephiroth said, humming thoughtfully for a moment. "You gonna finish that?"
"I..uh... I thought you were going to go visit your mother."
Sephiroth scrunched up him nose. "I was, wasn't I?"
"I don't think I'm gonna now," Sephiroth said, scratching his chin.
"I shouldn't visit her when ineb...immebe....drunk."
"Sir, if you don't continue to plan on visiting your mother, then we're going to have to return you to where you came from," one of the angel guards said.
"I'd fergotten about you ash-holes," Sephiroth muttered, glancing over his shoulder. "How much more time do I have left before I have to go back if I did visit my mommy?"
"About an hour."
"Then let me shtay here," he said, turning back to the table.
"I'm afraid we can't--"
"Let me shtay here!!" Sephiroth snapped, pounding a fist on the table. Faris snorted at the noise and lifted her head.
"Ey....whas goin' on?"
"Don't worry about it," Edgar said, patting her on the back of the head. "Go back to sleep."
"Riight...." Faris passed out again, her head returning to Edgar's lap. He smirked.
The guards eyed the other occupants of the table. "Well..."
"Let him staaay!" Zidane said, pouting. "We're trying to help him with his girl problems."
"Yeah, we're trying to help make him a better member of society," Tifa said. Sephiroth hiccupped.
The guards looked at them doubtfully. "An hour, then he has to go back."
"So ya'll are gonna help me figure out how to get Kuja to like me better than Kefka?" Sephiroth said, leaning on the table.
"Shure!" Zidane grinned. "We'll figure something out...."
"That's rilly nice of you guys..." Sephiroth hiccupped again.
"You want another drink?" Zidane offered.
"Shuuuure.... I've got an hour..."
end chapter 16